Sunday, December 30, 2018

Fw: New Golf Rules for 2019 - That Seniors may have missed

Happy New Year

I think that we have been over protective to our golf course. If you let carts out today would the course be damaged? We are closed for a month plus February. Don't claim we need revenue and then close the place. You can't damage what mother nature has already wrecked. 

I just can't walk the course so I was double punished. We lose site of the fact that members are an asset that should be protected. Members are an asset that can and have left. 

Mother Nature has been a bitch all of 2018, hopefully she will return to being the loving mother we need and never seem to appreciate. 

I think I will stop here before I really get in trouble. The year is done. Revenue lost can never be retrieved so lets hope that 2019 is a better years for all. 

Again - Happy and Healthy New Years to you and your family! 

Members are our life blood so if you have anyone thinking about joining be proactive contact membership ASAP 

"Please delete previous email threads"

under consideration for seniors 



Rule 1.a.5 

 A ball sliced or hooked into the rough shall be lifted and placed on the fairway at a point equal to the distance it carried or rolled into the rough with no penalty. The senior player should not be penalized for tall grass which ground keepers failed to mow. 

  

Rule 2.d.6 (B) 

A ball hitting a tree shall be deemed NOT to have hit the tree. This is simply bad luck and luck has no place in a scientific game. The senior player must estimate the distance the ball would have traveled if it had not hit the tree, and play the ball from there. 

 

Rule 3.B.3 

There shall be no such thing as a lost ball. The missing ball is on or near the course and will eventually be found and pocketed by someone else, thereby making it a stolen ball. The senior player is not to compound the felony by charging himself with a penalty. 

   

Rule 4.c.7(h) 

If a putt passes over a hole without dropping, it is deemed to have dropped. The Law of Gravity supersedes the Rules of Golf. 

   

Rule 5. 

Putts that stop close enough to the cup that they could be blown in, may be blown in. This SHALL NOT apply to balls more than twelve inches from the Hole. No one wants to make a mockery of the game. 

Rule 6.a.9(k) 

There is no penalty for so-called "out of bounds." If penny-pinching golf course owners bought sufficient land, this would not occur. The senior player deserves an apology, not a penalty. 

 

Rule 7.G.15(z) 

There is no penalty for a ball in a water hazard, as golf balls should float.  Senior players should not be penalized for any shortcomings of the manufacturers. 

 

Rule 8.k.9(S) 

Advertisements claim that golf scores can be improved by purchasing new golf equipment. Since this is financially impractical for many senior players, one-half stroke per hole may be subtracted for using old equipment. 




No, the MGA Board was not completely intoxicated when these new rules were reviewed.


Sunday, December 2, 2018

Fw: Check this out: Hanukkah

Happy Hanukkah which starts to night

Played yesterday and Friday, I am amazed at the shape the course is in, great job Jason and crew.

Clearing the ditch in front of 6th tee should help move water off the course

Indian night this Wednesday, this is a menu change - plus the man himself will be there (MS Donhi). Mahendra Singh Dhoni is an Indian international cricketer who captained the Indian national team in limited-overs formats from 2007 to 2016 and in Test cricket from 2008 to 2014. He is referred to by the media as Thala called affectionately by the CSK fans in Tamilnadu. An attacking right-handed middle-order batsman and wicket-keeper, he is widely regarded as one of the greatest finishers in limited-overs cricket. He is also regarded as one of the best wicket-keepers in world cricket and is know




Christmas brunches starting 



"Please delete previous email threads"


Wednesday, November 28, 2018

Fw: Ah Retirement . . .A Guy thing and funny

The Wednesday night game is back, contact John " Riverboat " Gavin for details. 

Tried to get plans at the library for plans to build an "Ark" that sob Noah never returned them. We might not have had 40 days and 40 nights of rain but mighty close. 

Someone informed me that Edison has addressed the deer problem all deer will now be called cows political way to solve the problem. Edison now has no deer but soon will be over run with political BS. 

"Please delete previous email threads"


 
Attached Message


C:

 
 
Subject: Ah Retirement . . .A Guy thing and funny
 


 
 
 

 
 
 
 
-
 
 
 It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger.  When you notice this, try not to yell at them.  Some are oversensitive, and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.

My name is Roger Lesch.  Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Peggy.

When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for Peggy to get a full-time job, along with her part-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed.

Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age.  I usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner.  I don't yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table.

I generally have lunch each day in the Men's Grille at the Golf Club, so eating out is not an option in the evening.  I'm ready for some home-cooked grub when I hit that door.  She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating.      But now, it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner.  I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves.   I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done, before she goes to bed.

Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think.  For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour.  But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement.  I tell her to stretch it out over two, or even three days. That way, she won't have to rush so much.  I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean).   I like to think tact is one of my strong points.

When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods.  For example, she had to take a break when she was only half-finished mowing the front lawn.  I try not to make a scene.  I'm a fair man... I tell her to fix herself
a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while.   And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me, too.

I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Peggy.  I'm not saying that showing this much patience & consideration is easy.   Many men will find it difficult.  Some will find it impossible !!!!   Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older. However, guys, if you even use just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile.    After all, we are put on this earth to help each other.


EDITOR'S NOTE:

Roger Lesch died suddenly on January 31, of a perforated rectum.

The police report says he was found with a Calloway extra-long 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II golf club jammed up his rear end, with barely 5 inches of grip showing, and a sledge hammer laying nearby.

His wife Peggy was arrested and charged with murder.  The all-woman jury took only 10 minutes to find her Not Guilty  - -  accepting her defense that Roger, somehow without looking, accidentally sat down on his golf club.

A hole in one, so to speak !!!!
 
 








 

Sunday, November 25, 2018

Fw: Gulf Buddies

Hope you had a great Thanksgiving

Hopefully 2018 will end and 2019 will be drier 

Think that foretees needs to be more forgiving.

Black Friday passed, cyber Monday tomorrow but it seems to rain every day 

"Please delete previous email threads"




 Gulf Buddies





What luck,!

Saturday, November 3, 2018

Fw: Greatest Golf Lesson Ever

I just love this golf lesson. It has been around before but it is worth revisiting

Remember to reset clocks back tonight

Not a big fan of the frozen tundra which should be a December event. Thinking that it will not be frozen at all

November Thanksgiving at MGCC

Foretees is nice but not very forgiving 



"Please delete previous email threads"





Begin forwarded message:

=

Saturday, October 13, 2018

Re: Contest

Went to a member guest at another club, a pay back for ours of two weeks ago. The other club had a nicer tee gift ( who cares) and the pro staff was very well dressed ( again who cares): MGCC was better in the important stuff: Food, service and most importantly the golf course. Nice job Joe, Jason, Andy, Chef and staff. 

Indians won again in the now annual Cowboys & Indians Tourney: Dr Sharma's par on 18 sealed the deal. Wait till next year again.

Have played away a number times this year, MGCC is one of the best tracks around. We just don't realize how good a job Jason and staff have done.

The deer herd needs to be culled. those cute babies are  eating machines. Heavy deer leave hoof prints on soft greens( bad combination) much worse then ball marks. 

"Please delete previous email threads"



On ‎Wednesday‎, ‎October‎ ‎10‎, ‎2018‎ ‎02‎:‎55‎:‎39‎ ‎AM‎ ‎EDT, Richie Klein <thirdgeneration@aol.com> wrote:




Thank You & Regards, 
Richie Klein
Third Generation Seafood
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Sunday, October 7, 2018

range

I just would like you as a group to revisit a first tee range.

Even if we tried it for the month of November. I honestly believe that the positives would out weigh the negatives. If an easy solution was available it would have been done. The people on the range and the first tee would be in eye line of each other which has to be safer then the current practice area where nine is dangerously in play. The tree line protects the 17th fairway and green. 

Rock Springs currently has a range which crosses their 18th fairway. 

Try it you'll like it 

"Please delete previous email threads"

Fw: golfers

Congratulations to all on the Irish team for their win and to the Italian team for a great match.  

The golf course is taking a real beating. Mother nature has been a very nasty lady. The number of divots not repaired or replaced is a reflection on the membership. Gentleman its our golf course please repair and replace. 

If you missed the one day member guest you missed a fun time.  The deli lunch was just right and the dinner very nice. The greens were just the best, fast and true. I just am not sure why it wasn't better attended? The price was right, finally decent weather.

The MGCC deer herd must number a hundred.

Ed Houston went to Mt Rushmore last week, what a great trip. Ed has some great picture. America is such an amazing place 

I know that the Irish won todays event but just remember " America is a beautiful Italian name."

"Please delete previous email threads"

 

 
A recent study found that the average golfer walks about 900 miles a year.
Another study found golfers drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year, which means, on average, golfers get about 41 miles to the gallon.
Kind of makes you proud. I almost feel like a hybrid.

----------------------
A husband and wife are on the 9th green when suddenly she collapses from a heart attack.
"Help me dear," she groans to her husband.
The husband calls 911 on his cell phone, talks for a few minutes, picks up his putter, and lines up his putt.
His wife raises her head off the green and stares at him. "I'm dying here and you're putting."
"Don't worry dear," says the husband calmly, "they found a doctor on the second hole and he's coming to help you."
"Well, how long will it take for him to get here?" she asks feebly.
"No time at all," says her husband. "Everybody's already agreed to let him play through."

——————————
A gushy reporter told Phil Mickelson, "You are spectacular, your name is synonymous with the game of golf. You really know your way around the course. What's your secret?"
Mickelson replied, "The holes are numbered."

————————
A young man and a priest are playing together. At a short par-3 the priest asks, "What are you going to use on this hole, my son?"

The young man says, "An 8-iron, father, how about you?"

The priest says, "I'm going to hit a soft seven and pray."

The young man hits his 8-iron and puts the ball on the green.

The priest tops his 7-iron and dribbles the ball out a few yards.

The young man says, "I don't know about you, father, but in my church, when we pray, we keep our head down."

————————————

Police are called to an apartment and find a woman holding a bloody 3-iron standing over a lifeless man.

The detective asks, "Ma'am, is that your husband?"

"Yes" says the woman.

"Did you hit him with that golf club?"

"Yes, yes, I did." The woman begins to sob, drops the club and puts her hands on her face.

"How many times did you hit him?"

"I don't know -- put me down for a five."

——————————
A golfer teed up his ball on the first tee, took a mighty swing and hit his ball into a clump of trees. He found his ball and saw an opening between two trees he thought he could hit through.

Taking out his 3-wood, he took a mighty swing. The ball hit a tree, bounced back, hit him in the forehead and killed him.

As he approached the gates of Heaven, St. Peter asked, "Are you a good golfer?"

The man replied: "Got here in two, didn't I?

—————————
The bride was escorted down the aisle and when she reached the altar, the groom was standing there with his golf bag and clubs at his side.

She said: "What are your golf clubs doing here?"

He looked her right in the eye and said, "This isn't going to take all day, is it?"

 
 

Sunday, September 23, 2018

Fw: Fwd: Trump Offers Obama a Job

Finally a weekend with just a little bit of rain. 

I can say that our course is in the worse shape I have ever seen it since I joined. I know that Jason and crew work as hard as they can and the main reason is the amount of rain. As members we have to help the amount of divots not repaired or replaced is too many. Soft greens get ball marks and skid marks repair them. 

I had a great pork roll sandwich at lunch today

Greens are rolling nicely

which is the toughest green to putt? 2, 17, or 8 actually you can make a case for all three plus others 

Fall one day member guest coming up. This one is reasonably priced so take advantage of it.

If you have a friend thinking of joining now is the perfect time to come aboard 





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Subject: Fwd: FW: Trump Offers Obama a Job

 
 
 
 
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Sunday, September 16, 2018

Congratulations to Michael Tomko and Jeff Goodman for their victory this week.  Member Member shoot out champions.


Yom Kippur 2018
  • begins Tuesday, September 18
    • at sunset (in 2 days)
  • ends Wednesday, September 19
    • at nightfall
  • Have a good fast

Fall golf is the best.

Hopefully it will be a dry season

     WORST FOURSOME IN GOLF HISTORY

 1. STORMY DANIELS

2. O. J.SIMPSON

3. TED KENNEDY

4. BILL CLINTON

 

WHY YOU ASK: 

 

1. STORMY IS A HOOKER.

2. O. J. IS A SLICER.

3. TED CAN'T DRIVE OVER WATER, and

4. BILL CAN'T REMEMBER WHICH HOLE HE PLAYED LAST.



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