Thursday, April 5, 2018


Tomorrow is one month that Rae passed. The past 100 days are a blur between JFK, JFK acute rehab, Roosevelt subacute rehab, coming home, her dying, funeral and everything else. 

I think that the masoleum choice was really good. Everything went smoothly think she would have been proud. Amazing number of people who attended the wake so nice. SJV did an exceptional job with the funeral mass plus the kids reading. All so perfect. Just never realized how much she needed me. 

I have so much time on my hands I just don't know what to do. Once I go for surgery and rehab I will be busier. So many people just call to check on me. I think I will be fine I have a great support group plus 7 grandkids. 

The support from my friends at Retro and MGCC has been so touching. Good friends are hard to find. Her classmates are so special and Gary Miller who came from Florida just to be here. Joey D calls me once a day to check on me. Dr. Sharma calls to make sure I am okay. Friends are so important.

 I thought I sent this out already

"Success is a life long journey not a destination"

Thursday, March 29, 2018


Monday and Tuesday were mostly lost days. Lots of hip pain, took Tylenol and Motrin just couldn't work it out. I put Retro membership on hold until after surgery and rehab. 
Wednesday woke up with significantly less pain. Got on the road early was at community hospital by 945 for nasal swab retest. Nurse are so nice in and out went to closkey office too early. They accommodated me, his pre-op associate looked at the x-ray and commented she was surprised I could walk at all. All set for the surgery. 
Stopped by shore medical center and visited with uncle Jimmy. Grace was there as well as Gemma nice visit. 

MGCC for tournament committee meeting, club membership is way down. 

Matt deluca from Allstate just called me to say hello. Said to stop in when I am out of rehab. It was a very nice conversation. 

Galloping hills and hit a bucket of balls feeling pretty good. Nice when people remember you.

Going to try to play golf tomorrow 

"Success is a life long journey not a destination"

Sunday, March 25, 2018

Palm Sunday

One thing is very consistent " it's always cold at St James Cemetery". Lots of people here, Palm Crosses every where. Guess we are all looking forward to spring, next Sunday is Easter. The resurrection and rebirth. We will go from good Friday the most solemnly day to Easter the most joyful in the short span of a weekend. 

I believe that our God is a happy God who doesn't want us to remain sad for a long time but wants us to look forward to the wonders of the world. Spring the best time of year ( not to mention a bit warmer) 

Writing this blog is really very therapeutic for me. 

In this age of instant communication I am still getting notes of sympathy from people who just heard. Plus everyone is tracking me and checking in to make sure I am okay. Good friends and family are very hard to find and most comforting. 

Have a nice Palm Sunday and a great Easter.

"Success is a life long journey not a destination"

Thursday, March 8, 2018


Second night in a row that Rae fell. 1215  sugar levels very low 72, trying to figure out her system. I need to talk to the her endocrinologist about this. 
Friday morning she must have died in her sleep. Just the police response and EMT s was overwhelming. Then they all were gone and she was on the floor, just seemed cruel and cold. The people from funeral home showed up and took her. Just so many questions and mental anguish.

Lisajoy, Geneen and I went to the funeral home to make the arrangements, the girls took care of everything. Arranged for flowers.

Going to do short session on Sunday and second session on Monday. Funeral Tuesday morning. 

Don't remember much else about Saturday but we were overwhelmed by the turnout Sunday and so many beautiful flowers. Chebanko Gerity did an outstanding job. 

So much food at the house we invited people over. I am worried about my brother he seems unsteady. My sister invited me to go to Hilton Head with her over Easter, not ready for that. 

Meg is coming cross country hope she doesn't hurt herself. Tom and Jon to follow. 
"Success is a life long journey not a destination"
Serge it

Tuesday, February 27, 2018

Black panther

Not sure why but I just didn't like the movie. Could be just too much hype. Okay as an action show but the story is a not believable and too predictable

"Success is a life long journey not a destination"

Sunday, February 25, 2018


Have to get other hip done this spring. Scheduled for second week in April hope to be back playing golf by the 4th of July. Guess that is price you pay for getting old which I am told beats the alternative.

Good luck to our new President Dave Oliver. 

The January thaw has extended into February hopefully good weather is here to stay but something about Lions, Lambs and March just scares me.

Easter is 34 days away 

"Success is a journey not a destination" 

        Golfer: "Think  I'm going to drown myself in the lake."
        Caddy: "Think you  can keep your head down that long?"

        Golfer: "I'd move heaven  and earth to break 100 on this course."
        Caddy: "Try heaven, you've already moved most of the earth."

       Golfer: "Do you think my game is improving?"
        Caddy: "Yes , you miss the ball much closer now."

        Golfer: "Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?"
        Caddy: "Eventually."

        Golfer: "You've got to be the worst caddy in the world."
        Caddy: "I don't think so . That would be too much of a Coincidence."

        Golfer: "Please stop checking your watch all the time. It's too much of a distraction"
        Caddy: "It's not a watch - it's a compass."

        Golfer: "How do you like my game?"
        Caddy: "Very good , but personally, I prefer golf."

        Golfer: "Do you think it's a sin to play on Sunday?
        Caddy: "The way you play,  it's a sin on any day."

        Golfer: "This is the worst course I've ever played on."
        Caddy: "This isn't the golf course.  We left that an hour ago."

        #1 Best Caddy Comment:
        Golfer: "That can't be my ball, it's too old."
        Caddy: "It's been a long time since we teed off, sir.."

        And the old favorite.....

        The Golfer has been slicing off the tee at every hole.
        He finally gives up and asks his long suffering caddy if he has seen any obvious problems.
       The caddy replies: "There's a piece of shit on the end of your club ".
        The Golfer picks his club up and cleans the club face at which point the caddy says:
         "No, the other end!"

Good news

Good news bad news went to Dr closkey right hip doing fine, now need left hip replacement. It's the never ending story. Scheduled it for early April should be done rehab by mid June. Of course my dues for the year at MGCC is already paid. 

Rae is progressing PT and OT were here this week. An aide is scheduled to visit her on Wednesday. She cut her leg again and I have been tending it.

Hospital bed will be delivered this week. She did sleep upstairs one night but I think it takes too much out of her. So she is sleeping downstairs for me. 

Got twice a day weekly pill box which I loaded up for the week. She has been taking her sugar numbers and administering her insulin. So far so good. 

Played gin with the guys on Wednesday night, it was so relaxing. 

I need to go back to Hyundai for service this week. Think I should have gotten another flex, flex has much bigger foot print. Maybe in five or six years

Being audited again by IRS but I am much better prepared and will not take Ralph with me, he was expensive and useless as I had to get everything done for it anyway. Last year I worked so less audits going forward.

Need to concentrate on selling the house and getting a stable place for us to live. 

Kneller's stopped by twice over weekend. 

"Success is a life long journey not a destination" 


Friday, February 23, 2018

Week ending 2/23

What a week:

Rae finally saw nurse, PT, OT and endocrinologist. So far so good. She is finally making progress on movement. Yesterday she went to the bathroom by herself all day. I only had to help her before bed time. I know she is getting better because she is worried about her hair. Being a care giver is not easy. No aide yet maybe next week. 

Serge's week was good and bad. Dr Iglesias was happy with me, except BP a touch high. Had lunch with Bella and she gave me pea soup for Rae. Dr Closkey liked right hip progress but said I really need to get the left one done. Weather mid week was outstanding. I went to see Uncle Jimmy. I really enjoy chair yoga just a relaxing hour. I had a great sandwich yesterday from Bella Gina in linden. Mortatella, fresh mozzarella, tomatoes, red onions, oil and balsamic vinegar. Had pirogies kielbasa for dinner, might have eaten a bit too much. 

Need to make a decision on the hip, sooner is better. Dr Closkey says it will be frontal so rehab is much quicker. Totally should be back in 2 months. 

"Live long and prosper"

Thursday, February 15, 2018

Super bowl week

After retro went to galloping hills to hit a bucket of balls, raining but that doesn't stop avid golfers, 15 die hard hitting balls at the range.

On 12/27/2017 she went in to JFK with an infection on her leg. Seems much longer than that.

Tomorrow is our 48th wedding anniversary. 

Tai chi cancelled yesterday instructor ill.
Anniversary brought flowers and gave out pastries to staff and residents. Lisajoy brought dinner from d'talia peppers and eggs sandwich for me. Joe back from New Orleans. Kneller's stopped by for an anniversary visit.

SJV patriotic song day all

Thursday meeting very contentious Rae has a higher opinion of what she can do as oppose to what she can really do which is limited. Need her to be able to get to the bathroom by herself. Not good she was in a nasty mood. 

Friday asked social worker about next week and had a short impromptu meeting the facility administer was there. Decided to revisit exit strategy next Wednesday afternoon. 

Kneller's stopped by and left after 715, Rae insisted I stay until she was in bed. I got home at 815
Ate my leftovers lunch short power nap and then DD at 945. Just a very long day.

The eagles won the super bowl

Dr Taylor worked on my knee, it felt great. She says that it felt like scar tissue built up. 

Thursday had a discharge summary and meeting. Life alert is ordered, will be installed next week. Discharge scheduled for Saturday afternoon. Chris from PT will go over getting in out of car. Myra is giving her a shower. 

Chair yoga was very relaxing today, don't think I will try Tai chi, wasn't what I expected. 

The first four days she is home have been eye opening. It's like having a new born but one that complains, demands and gives orders ( looking for immediate implementation). Not sure I can handle this. Girls have been fantastic both Isabelle and Adelina put up with her

I am a bit frustrated by the lack of assistance from Medicare, I have heard if you had medicade so many times, I don't so stop saying it. 

830 they are coming to draw blood on a fast. I left for the gym before 630 need to be home before 8

Life is a bowl of cherries with a lot of pits

Hoping for the best
"Live long and prosper"

Friday, February 9, 2018

MGCC 2018

Valentines day this week don't forget if you do; you most certainly will have a lot more than sin weeks of winter to contend with. Domestic tranquility for the years starts here. 

Fat Tuesday and Ash Wednesday (start of lent) polar opposites. Maybe I should put Rio for Mardi Gras on my bucket list. 

Spring training starts this week. 

If I am unhappy with things I should? 
A - take my ball and leave
B - do nothing and constantly complain
C - get involve and try to orchestrate change

and the answer is? 

Over the past year the winds of revolution have been brewing. A few na├»ve people tried to please everyone ( too funny), a few very smart people sat down made an attempt to develop a fair and reasonable compromise which when presented looked to appease the majority and which should have been a grand plan when implemented. How did that work out? 

Whatever happens, happens, nothing I say will change it. 

MGCC should be a haven where you go, be with friends and for a few hours relax. 

We have a duly elected board if you are not happy put together a slate and present your case to the voters. Catering to a vocal minority will leads us down the path of disaster. 

   Father Norton woke up Sunday morning and realizing it was an exceptionally
beautiful and sunny early spring day, decided he just had to play golf.
So... he told the Associate Pastor that he was feeling sick and persuaded
him to say Mass for him that day.
As soon as the Associate Pastor left the room, Father Norton headed out of
town to a golf course about forty miles away.
This way he knew he wouldn't accidentally meet anyone he knew from his
parish. Setting up on the first tee, he was alone. After all, it was Sunday
morning and everyone else was in church!
At about this time, Saint Peter leaned over to God while looking down from
the heavens and exclaimed, "You're not going to let him get away with this,
are you?"
God sighed, and said, "No, I guess not."
Just then Father Norton hit the ball and it shot straight towards the pin,
dropping just short of it, rolled up and fell into the hole.
St. Peter was astonished. He looked at God and asked, "Why did you let him
do that?"
The Lord smiled and replied, "Who's he going to tell?"

"Success is a life long journey not a destination"

Sunday, January 28, 2018

Blue monday

Both PT and OT counselor said she did well. Her appetite is back and the lasic dosage has been corrected. 
The progress is slow which bothers me. I am afraid that I will not be able to keep her motivated when she gets home and will regress. 
Been keeping up at the gym but am not sure why I keep missing things on my calendar, wondering if I should start using alarm functions

It's Sunday morning absolutely great work out at gym. Getting pain in front portion of left knee. Not sure but think the walking on the rehab hall has something to do with it. 
Think she is making progress, plus now has come to the realization that she is not the aide's only charge. She also has changed her opinion on Gracie who she didn't like to now her best buddy ( I had to bring Grace chocolate candies yesterday). 
She did her menu for the week now wants a copy so she can check on it.

Brought Vaccaro pastries and donuts a very big hit on Friday. 

I don't think I want to be a burden in my later stages. Hopefully I will just go quickly and peacefully, it's too depressing to watch. 

Wednesday night went out to dinner with doc and Gil to Taramina very nice. 

Need to get her out of the wheelchair and walking to the day room. This will be the challenge for the week. 

Michelle the aide last night told her she should be able to get out of bed by herself. 

"Live long and prosper"

Tuesday, January 23, 2018

Finally Friday

Great gym workout
D'TALIA for lunch
At Roosevelt rehab for a 2pm meeting with the exit counselor
Rae is a very demanding patient will do as little as you let her. You need to force her to do things
After looking at Woodbridge hills I need to give it serious consideration. 

"Live long and prosper"

Saturday, January 20, 2018

Fw: FW: Sign above the Urinal at the Golf Course Men's Locker Room

Pitchers and catchers will be reporting in 25 days a sure sign of spring

Ash Wednesday, St. Pats, and the Masters will be here before we know it

I have not been impressed by the new chef, I would guess the jury is still out. The test has  been a short one but I need to see more.

Member are the life blood of any club, history teaches us that 10 - 15% turnover is not unusual no matter how it happens so every spring we need to recover what natural attrition does plus more. Not an easy task with the competition for the disposable dollar that is available. 

Generating a revenue neutral budget with a membership that is a moving number no easy task. Good luck guys 

"Success is a life long journey not a destination"



Thursday, January 18, 2018


At the gym and phone rang: Rae complaining about the lack of attention she is getting. I tried to explain that she is one of many and has to try and help herself. Wrong tactics and comments 
Going to bank, Edison family restaurant, acme and Roosevelt rehab facility. 

Lunch beef barley soup meatloaf, well done French fries, green beans and seltzer. 

Acme South Plainfield is closed, had to go to ShopRite, got Rae Snapple diet peach tea.

Saw nurse Maria she said weight down a few more pounds. 

Put her on her iPad

210 she went to PT

Isabelle and Jack won their age group foul shooting at SJV event run by knights of Columbus, Joseph came in second in his age group.
Thursday went to gym, looked at Woodbridge hills a 55 and over community. I liked it not sure Rae will ever move.
Watched her at rehab, progressing. Met with social worker and tomorrow will meet with the discharge counselor. Going to wake for Joyce Linda Miller sister

"Live long and prosper"

Thursday, January 11, 2018


10 days of hospital for Rae finally moving to rehab. A new chapter, their goal is to have her get out of bed and walk to bathroom on her own. I hope that they are successful

The epiphany what a great day so far. Boys won there basketball game ( Jack game winner), Rae going for evaluation ot and PT ( fratterolos Joe, Jen and Jess visited). So far so good.

Isabelle's BB team did well on Sunday
Monday she went to rehab two sessions. 

I brought her two white castles no pickles. I really hope that the rehab works

Sitting here Sunday watching football I realized how much she needs me. I just hope I can hold up my end of the bargain

Had lunch at D'talia saw Chris, had cheese steak sandwich left a quarter of it.  I feel stuffed, need to eat less of the French fries lol.

Watched her at rehab she looks so weak.

Wednesday  I am going to play cards at Joey D house, she keeps asking if I am really going. 

Great gym day, Maria is sending me the contact info for women who took care of her mother, $20 per hour but will shower her and keep the house clean. Will do what you need done. All cash

"Live long and prosper"

Tuesday, January 2, 2018


Happy new year
At JFK for nyeve 
Gym this morning wasn't very full but saw a couple of regulars.
Brought a Panera bagel pack to the nurses, really a great value. I think they enjoyed it

Rae's nurse said her leg wound was still draining. She said no Dr have been in today. I asked specifically about Dr Shah, I didn't see him yesterday, nurse said his daughter may have been here as she is also his associates.

Liver specialist was in she has a fatty liver which needs to be addressed but not a major concern as of now. 

She ordered umami chicken for lunch. Oriental flavor plus potato soup. Seems to be enjoying it.

Stayed until 830, really cold weather. Stopped at DD for coffee

Tried to watch football but too nervous about Rae. Lasic dosage not right, she is healing but other things are popping up.

Tuesday morning spoke to Dr Sharma and Dr Wilkes office. Wilkes will call Sharma. Lasic dosage finally back to correct dosage. 

Spoke to infectious specialist Dr Shah she said that the culture showed MSSA but the type that can be dealt with by oral antibiotics. Good news

Went to sansone Hyundai, I have decided to just pay off the loan. The move to td bank really pissed me off. As soon as I get the title I will be happy

"Live long and prosper"
Serge pop